My Slam-a-rama Slinkster Cool Days

A Simple Message...

Tue, 20 May 2008 01:35:23 GMT

Listen to the musn'ts, child.
Listen to the don'ts.
Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts.
Listen to the never haves
Then listen close to me,
Anything can happen, child,
Anything can be.
~Shel Silverstein

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A little Love Song

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 22:31:24 GMT

So this is one of my favorite Titans fics. It's a Raven/ Jinx fic and I for some reason I love it. Maybe because my beta, Orange was so very excited by it. Maybe because I just got to use a lot of synonms for love, who knows. Any way here it is, after the pretty little cut...

A Little Love Song

A/n: This is my first shojo-ai piece. It was different for me because it was a piece about love between two girls. But surprisingly I found that once I found my…groove the story rolled right onto the paper. The story involves my two favorite females, Jinx and Raven. It’s told from Jinx’s point of view. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: Teen Titans are property of DC Comics. Not me. The title of the piece comes from the amazing song of the same name by the awesome Jose Vanders. Also certain lines were inspired by the beautiful poem ‘i carry your heart’ by the great e.e.cummings.

She carried her heart. Lying next to her beloved in the moonless night, hand clasping hers, she knew it to be true. The lily-white woman next to her held Jinx’s heart. Her heart was nestled right next her inamoratas, where they fluttered in tandem, like two small birds in flight. Like two flickering, flittering stars exploding into supernovas.

Staring at the amethyst head cuddled to her chest, ear pressed to her heart in hopes of hearing it soft and soothing lullaby Jinx could only smile tenderly. Smile and thank the empyrean for leading their souls to one another. For letting them find and hear each other above the noise and the babble of the world.

They hadn’t planned this. Neither girl had foreseen one another in each other’s lives, in each other’s paths. At least not like this they hadn’t. They had been enemies’ first, acquaintances, battle buddies and compatriots and finally friends. They hadn’t ever considered the possibility that their friendship would effloresce into something deeper, burst forth into something more potent, more puissant, and more meaningful.

Never did they dream they would end up finding the one who could answer the songs their souls were singing. Soul mates. Beloved.

But they did. Above the din, the tumult and the cacophony of the world, who tried to keep them apart, who told them that they shouldn’t, couldn’t, wouldn’t be together; they heard and found each other. They found each other even though the world tried it’s damnedest to keep them apart. They heard the siren call of their souls to one another.

They did not hide their love. Love was the one emotion Raven found setting her free, allowing her to live to truly free herself from all prior bonds and restraints, turning her cloak the most stunning shade of white, that she seemed to glow, to shine. And Jinx…Jinx was a firm believer that one could not tell their heart who to love, who to share themselves and their world with. She was a firm believer that no one else could tell whom to love either. She believed that love knew no sex, knew no race, and knew no boundaries. It only knew the brightness of the loved ones smile, the sweetness of their kiss, the gentle balm of their souls upon each other. Besides who cared if the world had a stick up its ass. All that mattered was that she and Raven were happy.

They knew as sure as they knew that the sun would rise, that not everyone in their world would share their joy, their happy, their love (it had taken Jinx months to get the surprisingly conservative Kid Flash to speak to them again). But they were okay with that. They did not need the world to love them because they had each other. It was enough. It was all they needed, all they found they truly wanted.

Looking over at the dreaming woman beside her, her milk-white face marred by the creasing of the sheets, her small hands grasping Jinx’s equally tiny hand, fingers intertwined, all Jinx could think about was how much she loved her. All she could focus on was the amazingly intense surge of love rushing through her. How much she wanted to be with her for as long as the gods above could give them.

She knew that as long as they were together she could face the day. As long as she was hers, she feared no destiny, no kismet, because Raven was her destiny, her fate. The picturesque girl next to her was her all, her world, her home, her roots, and her truth. She was the wonder, the joy, and the grace that was keeping the stars apart.

And Jinx adored her for it.

Jinx wanted to hold Raven’s heart in her hands, cradle the sweet light, the fragile flames of her soul with her own. She wanted to sing the opus in their hearts, exclaiming the voiceless melody from the top of the highest hills, sending her love to heavens above.

She carried her heart. She carried it in her heart.

A/N: So yeah…here it is. Um…I like this. A lot. I truly do enjoy this piece, although I’m not sure what it is that I love about it. I’m not really sure what more to say except that I hope you all like it too. Leave me a review and let me know what you think.

Yeah so the rest of my fics will probably pop up here, even though most are old. So yeah...that's all.

'Sup

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 22:22:40 GMT

So I kinda keep forgetting that I have added some new friends to my flist. So to all of you awesome people who are on my flist I say: SUP.

So I know its wayyyyy below my age range but I'm kinda caught up in the Naked Brothers Band. It both baffles and amazes me that these tiny little kids are not only mini-rock stars but also pretty darn good musicians. At 12 years old I was burying my Barbie cause I found her sexist, and lip-synching to songs on the radio. And just learning how to control the crazy,curly,twirly mess that is my hair.

Speaking of hair I'm thinking of getting the Braizlian hair treatment,which will straighten it for up to two months. I've heard it's not as bad as the Japanese version, except for the fact that it uses formaldahyde. Which is also used in dead people. So yeah, embalming fluid will be in my hair. But yeah at least it'll be nice and straight and shiny. You know beauty knows no pain and all that jazz.

I hope it won't smell though.

So it'll probably be a seperate post but I think I'm probably going to some of my older fics here.In fact since I have some time today before I leave, I think I'll do it now.

Dentist day

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 13:08:14 GMT

So my appt to get my mouth fixed is today. I am dreading this appt like crazy, because I know he's going to give my novacain and that requires a shot and yeah...really not helping to ease my fears. I'm thinking of asking for laughing gas instead cause I really don't want a shot. At all. Ever.

As I stand out here though I think I should've rescheduled this appt for Wednesday that way I'd just stop after work.God I hope I only need a crown and not a root canal cause I really don't want to be in pain.

So after this I need to set up a doctor and opthamologist appt, as well as get new specs. The opthamologist appt is to see if I can get Lasik and if I can safely wear contacts without the swelling and redness. And then the dermatologist and then finally I should be done for a while.

Btw I hate the bus. And metro.Too many people for my comfort level.AND everyone spits!!! Fucking disgusting habit!

So my brain has been buzzing with fic ideas for weeks.Too bad every single time I begin to write them out they just die.I have some beautiful ideas blooming for my Twilight fics and yet none of them come out right. My Titans fics are also at a stand still.Augh. Its aggravating to have these stories inside me and not be able to transfer them down correctly.

OMG. Saw Madonna's new video for '4 minutes'. Holy fucking shit whatever that woman is using is freaking amazing. She looks fantastic.She looks better than most 20 somethings do.

So here are some of my fics ideas, which I'll put into a separate post later on.

FIC IDEAS:
TWILIGHT

Childhood living- Begins when Jake is 5 and Bella is 7.Goes through those summers she visited and Jake's memories of her.

If I Should Stay: Bella's wedding is here.Last minute doubts creep in. Stay and let it all go or leave and find something new?

Liar,Liar- She was lying to her heart. And sooner or later it would catch up to her.

Untitled-Emily Young's point of view on Bella and what she's doing to her boys.

Nineteen-Renee remembers being 19,unsure of herself and in love.She doesn't want Bella to repeat her mistakes.

Untitled: Bella can't know love. Not when she barely knows herself.

TEEN TITANS:

Gravity: She was her sun. Her solar system. Her gravity. A Rae/Jinxy piece.

So long, farewell- The time has come to let go and walk away.

**************

So yeah that's all for now.More while come. On top of those I also have to edit my vignettes for Mediaminers fic challenge.

Oy vey, I think I'm going to be late for my appt. This bus ride is taking ridiculously long to get to its destination.

(God this is a long ass post)

My cousins bday is next month and she's having a huge bash. All fine and dandy except for some reason she wants us in "garden party attire". Which, not to be funny, makes me think of the Kentucky derby and those ridiculous ass outfits, with hats and gloves and all that jazz. Let me just say right now that I do not like hats. Nor do I like gloves unless its cold. So if push comes to shove I will just be under-dressed. I'm hoping that a sweet sundress will work, but I plan on emailing her just to double check.

Gah!!Shit I am going to be late. Fuck. And I'm underground so I can't call and tell them. Shit,shit,shit!! Godforsaken mass transit.

Lateness aside, I haven't enrolled in school yet. Somethings may be happening this summer so school may wait till fall.

Oh. I found the cutest party dress for Giz (cause of course she's coming) its a sunny yellow and has a bow and yeah I have an illness I know.

I think the woman across from me is talking to herself. Yes, yes she is. She has her hand on her ear like she's on a hands free earpiece but...shè isn't. Trust me I peeked and saw no blinking light or anything.

Just called dentist. I am so freaking late...okay so it'll only be like 15 minutes but still I'm late.

You know I considered locking my lj and making it semi-friends only but since I don't really have a flist it seemed wasteful. So its open to all and everyone who stumbles here can read my deepest darkest bullshittiest secrets. Enjoy.

I think I'm done posting for now.Pray that this appt doesn't hurt too badly.

Tue, 01 Apr 2008 23:49:53 GMT

I don't think it was a good idea to wash down my tylenol(which I took cause my tooth actually hurt) with a zyrtec, which I took due to the high ass pollen count today. I say this because I am suddenly feeling super tired. Whatevs I can just crash on the metro.

One more day till my vacation. A whole week off. Yay me!! I may forget how to work in that time.

Saw that Sakura blossoms on Saturday. I love going down there because the beauty of the trees never fails to stop and make me appreciate my planet. Everything is so pink and sweet and just gorgeous.Plus we brought Izzie, which is the first time we've had a dog to bring since King. She had so much fun, running here and there and playing with all the other dogs. And we saw some amazing kites being flown cause it was just that kind of day. All in all we had an enjoyable Saturday and my sister went back to school happy.

Still no response from Orange on my fic...which would make me nervous except I don't think she's had time to read it yet.I'm thinking of just posting it anyway, although I found some things I want to edit, again.

I've stopped losing weight. I was losing a little bit but since I've been taking it easy for almost 2 weeks its completely fucked me up. I plan on getting back on the treadmill though as well as detoxing all vaca.

Um that's all for now.

Fractured

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 12:32:19 GMT

So I thought my ankle was getting better. The swelling had for the most part disappeared and I could walk on it,with only a bit of a twinge. Apparently I was wrong. While at work last night my ankle decided that suddenly crumpling and causing me to fall would be a good thing. OMFG! It hurt. I thought I'd resprained the damn thing it hurt so bad.And its still tender on the right side. Two of co-workers mentioned that it maybe a hairline fracture,since I can walk.Which means a doctors appointment and possibly surgery...or something equally sucky.

(excuse me as I flip out):FUCK!FUCK!FUCK! FUCK!STUPID PIECE OF SHIT OF SIDEWALK THAT TRIPPED MY DUMBASS!GOD DAMN IT!!

Okay.I'm better now. So I told all this to my mom and she recommended I wait another day or two and then if after a full week its still brusied to call my doctor.

So I'm on my way home to shower,get my sister dressed and showered and then to go back out, go see Strayer and then on to DC for a sisterly adventure. I say we hit Chinatown.And Bethesda.

Its a good thing I took off or else I'd be tired as shit again at work. I need to buy some Tylenol PM or get my doctor to prescribe me a nice sleeping pill.Like Ambien. Cause I sleep horribly lately and again this cannot continue.

And I'm supposed to get my new cellphone today. Yeah for the Blackberry curve.(i hope.)

I'd choose bruises over breaks any day

Wed, 26 Mar 2008 00:26:13 GMT

My ankle is still brusied and a bit tender but thankfully not broken and no longer swollen to the size of a goose egg. I can rotate it,although it twinges a bit and I can walk on it.Thank goodness for that,cause it would've killed me if I had broken it.

Of course now I walk A LOT slower with the dog, all in an effort to avoid busting my ass again.

On my way to work now. Depending on what time I hit the station I may stop and get some dinner or...I may subsist on the raisin bran, bacon and popcorn from breakfast today.

Still didn't post or even type my fic.I've been procrastinating. Plus I'm a bit worried about it being unbeta'd cause Orange is not a twilighter so...yeah.I figure I should just buckle down and do it tomorrow morning when I get home. I think its okay. I mean the grammar and whatnot may need some edits but for the most part I don't think its completely sucky.

Clumsy, i just can't help being it...

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 15:33:02 GMT

So my morning was going relatively good. Picked up some food for breakfast, got home before 10:00 am, all signs were pointing towards me having a wonderful Saturday morning. Then I took the dog out and after some repeated escape attempts( she knows if she pulls hard enough the collar will click open) I was carrying Iz and heading back to the apartment.

Then it happened. I tripped. Of course as per usual when I trip it wasn't a graceful tumble but instead a full on splat on my face. Except this time I landed on my ankle and some glass. Oh and my dog took a tumble with me. My ankle hurt soooooooooo bad that walking was painful and I cried the whole way back to apartment. Yes I realize I'm a big baby but damn it all that shit hurt. Plus everytime I called my sister (who is home for the week) or my mom to get her to call Tiana I got no answer.

So the moral of the story is that I have a hugely(I look like I have a cankle) swollen,sprained ankle that causes me to hobble like Tiny Tim, except not so tiny. My other leg is busted,bruised and bloody. My ego hurts, and my dog is perfectly alright.

I fucking hate Saturday mornings.

I'm hoping the swelling goes down or else I don't know what I'll do about work.I mean sure I sit for most of that time but I do have to go up some stairs and I will need to get up and pee at some point.

Again: I hate Saturdays.

Fic progress

Fri, 21 Mar 2008 00:55:21 GMT

It always,always surprises me when I begin to make progress on any of my fics. Yet here I am with my first J/B fic finished. All edits done and all emotions scattered across the pages.Its a disaster and a mess and still I continue to do this because I find it strangely beautiful.

Now that's its done I just need to find time and energy to post it. I doubt it'll be posted here simply cause figuring out the fake cut is too much work for me. So I guess it'll reside at ff.net, nestled away between my Titans fics, which I'm finding I may have more of those as well.Its nice seeing the random fandoms I dabble in.Makes me feel special and involved in something.

Of course as soon as I finished this one, two more moved into its creative space. Whether I write them or not depends on the response to this one. Too much negative energy and they'll just rot in my mind.

So I doubt I'm posting tomorrow. Still ddebating if I'm taking part in this strike or not.Probably so although it'll be hella hard to avoid griping and moaning here.

Anyway I again mananged to catch the 830 shuttle sooooo while I will be at work early enough to sleep I will also be super hungry. I wonder if I can get someone to go to McDonalds for me. Chicken nuggets aren't bad for me. I mean they are but they won't completely kill my diet.

Which is going okay, I guess. I think I've lost inches but not pounds which aggravates the hell out me, cause I can't see inches right away. But even my mom mentioned that I looked like I was slimming down so who knows.

Ugh.I don't want to think about my weight.Makes my head hurt.I think I'm going to start my nap now.

Rain.

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 12:52:55 GMT

I'm suffering from a broken heart.Why? Cause I really have come to the decision that Hilary Clinton is not going to win.Obama fever has just swept the nation and I really see no way for her to come back and win. It breaks my heart because Mrs.Clinton is the only woman in the forseeable timeframe who is going to get this close.It hurts because I firmly believe Obama would have another chance at winning in the next election. It sucks cause I want so badly to see a woman represent my coutry. I know, I know as a minority I should support him more but my heart won't let me. Not while she's still in the race.

But still I'm heart broken.

Just blah...

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 00:30:00 GMT

So its that time again. The time when my body decides to rebel against me and cause some unbearable amount of pain in places that only internal medicines reach. I hate this time. Makes me want to do nothing except cry and curl up into a tinny,tiny ball.

So I'm still not satisfied with my newest oneshot. I've been editing and reworking it in my mind for days to no avail.I may just scrap it completely and start on a new plot bunny. I wish I could make it work though cause I'd love to post it in the J/B comm.

So I paid for and picked up my shitty taxes. I just need to mail them off and then wait. My taxes this year were shit despite making nearly 10,000 grand more than I did last year. Damn exemptions messed me up. However at least I don't owe the Feds anymore. I forgot to include some work related expenses.That got me $30 dollars back from the Feds.Next year I'm going to make sure everything is right. Cause this paying the government shit is cuckoo bananas and I refuse to be a slave to the MAN anymore than is necessary to survive.

Ugh.I feel like vomiting. Even after the Advil I still feel queasy. Maybe instead of going to buy a book I should go and buy a ginger ale. Oh wait maybe I can get a micro soda at CakeLove. That sounds good, a micro green tea soda.

Wish I could get some sleep too. I've been awake since about 6am. At least tomorrow I have ride to work so I get to sleeeeeeeep till late.

I went to the dentist yesterday.So far he said I have no new cavities. Nor do I need any root canals.However the tooth I broke needs a cap and crown.Luckily it wasn't one of the teeth he'd already fixed.It was just one of my fragile back teeth.I broke the side closest to my cheek and he can fix it and hopefully save it.Good stuff. I go back in two weeks for that appt.Next up I need to visit the optometrist and the dermatologist.I need new glasses and some internal skin care meds.

My dog is craftier than I thought. She whines when she knows its time for me to leave cause it makes me feel bad and linger with her. She also snuck out today as I was trying to leave and was halfway around the building before I caught her. I think I should invest in a doggy gate and put her in the back of the apartment with the gate closing off the living room.

Ah, yeah I'm all LJ'ed out so adios!

More is always better

Fri, 14 Mar 2008 13:59:55 GMT

and by more I mean money. I got a bit of a raise! Yay me. And yeah I realize that .37¢ is not going to break my bank or anything but still its enough to have me making over 12 dollars an hour and that makes a difference when my paychecks come.

Augh. I fell asleep in my contacts and now my right eye is again all red and gross.Bleh. I need laser vision surgery asap cause this shit sucks.

Still not over my cold but at least I don't feel like I dying a slow and snotty death.I do however still have the cough from hell.

I'm dying my hair this weekend. I decided to fore-go the pink and just go blonde again.Yeah I know its kind of predictable but still I like being blonde.

Augh. My eye is killing me. I think I'm taking the cab home cause I can't wait for the bus I need this contact out asap.

Plans...

Wed, 12 Mar 2008 12:58:10 GMT

so I know I'm supposed to spend all day sleeping and drugging myself so that my cold goes away. I KNOW. But, and this is a really good one, I have like half a dozen Jacob/ Bella plots buzzing in my brain, just begging to be fleshed out into something more! Like srsly I haven't been this inspired in a long while and totally don't want to lose these ideas when they're so very fresh in my brain.

Maybe I can settle for writing them all down so I don't forget them. Truly though, J/B is definitely an awesomely sweet pair to write about cause they let me be angsty and romantic all at once. Plus I get to let Jacob use the word 'honey'! Sweet!!

Lol. I am so tired that the littlest things are thrilling me. I definitely need to get some sleep today.

I need some new reading material,since I tore through the Twilight series. I'm thinking of picking up Isabel Allende's 'House of Spirits'. She's such an amazing author, with her magical way of writing and transcending the universes. I also may pick up 'Chocolat' and Ann Brashears new one too. Still in desperate need of good reading.

Ugh. My throat gets scrapped raw each time I cough. I wish I had some honey to coat my throat cause it hurts like hell. Add to that my stuffy nose, cottony ears and my horrible wracking cough and yeah its a good thing I took off.

So She & Him, have made themselves a beautiful album full of cuckoo bananas music. Love it. Zooey Deschanel has this amazingly sweet voice and yet it still has this almost raspy quality that just makes her sound so very different from anyone else out there. And her songs are beautiful. Love songs and songs about life. Just gorgeous. If this is Volume One, I can't wait for Volume Two.

Almost home. Thank you lord. I am struggling to keep my eyes open.

I need a personal day

Wed, 12 Mar 2008 00:38:15 GMT

A day where I do nothing but sleep. Sleep long and hard. Too bad I don't see that happening till the beginning of April. Who knows, maybe I can swindle my way into another off day if I look really,really exhausted around my mom.

Gah! Just offically finished my first Twilight piece. Its uber-short but still, it's done! Yay me. I'm going to try and post it tomorrow after work. Its a total J/B piece but its kinda sad cause she's still going thru all that Eclipse set up.

I need a drivers license. I know, I know this is like my mantra but honestly I am so freaking tired of the bus/train. It is really aggravating to have to leave the house so early just to catch a shuttle to work. Plus it doesn't do anything to ease my minor cold/flu. In fact I think it makes it worse.

So I put in my contacts today, trying to test them out and all. And... nothing. No redness, itchiness, soreness, or swelling. Its like the weekend never happened. Definitely an allergy attack, of the worst degree.

Augh, now that I've finished one fic I feel the need to do more. Wish I had some idea of where to start.

Ooh. I caught the shuttle early today! Awesomeness cause this means I'll be able to sleep when I get to work.Plus I don't have to sit outside for almost 40 minutes waiting for the shuttle either.

In fact I think I'm going to get a headstart on the sleeping thing and start now.

Less ow, but still fuck.

Sat, 08 Mar 2008 14:19:56 GMT

Sooo my eyes are still reddy red red.Have been for nearly 2 days now. which stinks. However, due to a double dosing of benadryl, a dose of zyrtec and some very nice eyedrops and minty tea bags the swelling has pretty much disappeared. which is good. Thank you kindly baby Jesus for small miracles.

At least I no longer look like my eyes have been attacked by killer bees or like a blowfish. Now I just look like I was either very high recently or am very hungover. Lets go with the alchol related one, k?

Soo I now desperately need to make an appointment with an allergist and and optometrist. I want laser eye surgery, cause my glasses suck ass and my contacts make me cry/look like a stoner. A nice shot with a laser though would erase all such issues. Plus it'd just be cool to say I had a laser in my eyes.

Anyway some people (my sister)have been suggesting that I'm allergic to Gizmo. To that I say too damn bad. The dog stays in the picture and I will just have to be on some heavy ass pills to counteract her allergens. That puppy is mine and she is not going anywhere. Although I should make an effort to keep her off my bed.

I removed a few bricks in the wall that is my writers block. Yay me!! Of course its Twilight based, since that's all can focus on right now. But still yay me! There is hope for me yet! Its a Jacob/Bella piece, cause Edward weirds me out with all his cheesy words and slightly controlling behaviors.But Jacob is hawt!! And a werewolf, which vastly increases his hotness level.

Anyway I think I'm catching the flu that my mom caught from her students. I'm a bit achy and coughy and bleh. Shit on a hot tin roof, I do not need another cold.I just recovered from the last one I got in February. This is what I get for not wearing a mask around her sick behind.

You know people who make out in the metro stations irk the living shit out of me. I mean come the fuck on, the trains service the metropolitan area! Its not like you're in a fucking Amtrak station and you're traveling to a diff. state! Trust me no one wants to see two idiots cuddling and giggling and swapping spit on the train, especially at 8 fucking am.

Fuck. It is freaking pouring out. Thanks a lot, mother nature. Luckily I have a umbrella, ella, ella, (could not resist) but still the bus smells like wet dog and rat thanks to the water. And ass. Definitely smells like ass too.Still baffles me how some people have not cold weather coats or 'brellas. Like where do they think we live, California?

So my girl Hilary C.is talking about a Clinton/Obama or Obama/Clinton ticket. Hotess thing to hit politics ever is what that ticket would be. Like srsly who would be able to stop the Dems then? John McCain would wither to dust beneath their collective feet. History and the world would never be the same again. Too bad Obama and his posse aren't thinking that way. They're still babbling about sharper criticism of Hil's background and policies. Like really? That's where you're gonna go? You're going to contine the slander and dirty tactics instead of considering the awesomeness that could be. It would be an amazing tag team, no matter whose name topped the ticket (although I'm praying hard for Hilary. History is happening and am have never,ever,ever been more excited to see it unfold. A black man is thisclose to the White House. A woman is also thisfreakingclose to the White House. Holy Jesus. It is truly a beautiful thing to see. Like for the first time in nearly 8 years I am proud to be part of the US of A. Nowhere else in the world do things like this come to pass.

Ow ow fuckity fuck!!!

Fri, 07 Mar 2008 15:26:30 GMT

goddamn motherfucking allergies! curse you to hell! Fuck fuck fuck this hurts!!!!

My allergies have hit again and of course my eyes are all dry and red and because I was dumb enough to put my contacts on they are also swollen and the angriest red color ever. I actually took my right contact out and threw it away it hurt so goddamn much. My left eye is so-so but still I cannot wait to get home. Especially when all I want to do is cry and cry til the pain goes away.

Writer's Block: Work & Self-Worth

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 02:08:56 GMT

Does your current occupation affect your self-worth?

View 500 Answers

Sometimes my job makes me feel awesome,cause how many 21 yr old college students make what I'm making and have full health care?

Other times I feel shitty about it cause it is easy to get sucked in and be there for like 15 years. And sometimes I worry that that's going to be what I become. A callcenter lifer.

Writer's Block: Charmed, I'm Sure

Wed, 05 Mar 2008 04:53:54 GMT

What is a "charmed life"?

Submitted By busterbenson

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I've been told that my life is "charmed" because of the places I've been and the gifts I get and just the general way my family and life has treated me. But to me a 'charmed life' is just a life where you're happy and you find joy in the sweet and simple things. That's my version of 'charmed'.

Do I dazzle you?

Wed, 05 Mar 2008 03:32:27 GMT

So I wore a dress to work today, and as more and more people (mostly male) took notice and made comments all I could think of is those funny Edward Cullen/Rob Pattison icons that say "Do I dazzle you?" Lol. Like srsly this is where my mind goes when I'm functioning on limited hours of sleep. Maybe I'll get lucky and someone will put that shit on tee shirt so I can where it full-time. Of course then I would fully expect a hot Jacob shirt too.

So in-between being obessed with Twilight, I just found out today that South of Nowhere is ending after this season. Srsly??? WTF!!! Did the execs of the show and those running the-n lose their collective effing minds??? This is sooooooooooooo not cool. In fact I am borderline considering dumping the-n all together and just feeding my Degrassi hunger another way. Like SoN is the most realistic and awesome show the netowrk has and to just cut it like that is just wrong! What will I do if I can't spazz about my girl-crush on the Supercouple that is SpAshley?!! I'll tell you what. I will shrivel up and die a horrible SpAsh free death that is so no fun. Almost as not fun as my Palex death.

I am feeling semi-creative. Twilight seems to be stirring my fic-writing urges, especially towards Jacob and Bella. They're just cute together and he tries SO hard to make her see that and despite his hotness Edward just seems...odd and all I want to do is give Jake his happy ending with the girl of his dreams.

And finally...my beta,Orange lives. Thank the stars cause I so need her wacky wisdom and quirky stories.

Too Early....

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 10:32:47 GMT

My dog is evil. She woke me up at 4:00 am. Why? Because my mother who was leaving for her run, woke her up and got her all excited, thinking that she was going out for a walk. But she played her and because of that she decided to wake me up. At first it was cute because she was licking me and nibbling my hair...then it became evil when she decided to start whining and running back and forth.So I get up and at 4 am,take her out. Thank goodness all the crack-heads are too busy getting their high to pay me any attention. Now she's back in the house, snoring away and here I am, wide awake at 5 fucking am! Cause you know it's not like I have a job to get to today or anything.

Augh!!! Guess I better chalk up today to a day of being tired and groggy while working. Better make sure I buy some Red Bull and coffee.

Blind and toothless, thats me.

Sat, 01 Mar 2008 13:43:41 GMT

I have the irrational fear that I am going blind in my right eye. Its been red for nearly a week and it feels swollen and icky. I ruled out pink-eye due to the lack of crust and ooze.So naturally my next idea is glucoma and blindness.

On top of that one of my teeth has decided to break in half. Seriously the entire lower front half of one of my back teeth snapped off while I was eating a panini! I am beyond traumatized because I can feel the emptiness and the jagged remains of my poor tooth. Like honestly though I just got this tooth fixed last year! The damn thing should not be falling apart...although I do vaguely remember him saying that this tooth was very fragile. But still! I was eating a sandwich! Ugh now I have to try and get an appointment for this week.Ugh, I'm sure he is going to try and stab with one of those novacain filled needles he loves so much.Ugh the agony and pain is already weasling its way into my brain.

On a slightly brighter note my face seems to be healing. Very small, almost unnoticeable breakouts these past two weeks. Very good news.

But come on! I cannot be blind and toothless before my 22nd birthday. I mean ideally I'd prefer to never be blind and toothless but I realize that times fucks with everyone's body differently when you're old. But that's then, not now!

Seriously God, Jesus, Buddha, whomever I will be a really awesome person if you don't make me blind and toothless before I'm fifty. Like I promise to smile at the elderly and not say they're annoying and smell like pee;and I won't make fun of the crazy zealots on the street because they can't help it if they're passion is so strong and...and I truly don't want to be blind and toothless this early.

Ahh. My mom is going to shit a brick when I show her my tooth. I may not live to see 22 anyway once she realizes what's happened to my poor tooth.This may truly break her heart, especially since she paid for my braces.

Ewww. This woman at the bus stop not only has a roll of tissue in her purse she is also throwing all her used tisse balls on the ground, instead of the trash. Nasty. And all the seagulls out here are making me edgy. They're like pigeons only grosser.

Going home to my puppy, who my mom says was almost attacked by a cat last night. Lol. I'm sorry but the irony is kind of amusing. A cat attacking a dog. She's okay though, so all is good.

God, I'm tired. I need sleep and lots of it.Like now.Or at least in the next hour. I hope this bus is on time.

Anyway yeah, that's all.

Writers Block sucks ass...

Sat, 01 Mar 2008 02:26:41 GMT

I hate having writer's block. It is the true bane of my existence. I have been trying for months to write something and still nada. Its getting pretty damn frustrating. Its like every time I start,it begins well enough but soon after it all just falls apart. I lose the meat of the piece.And to make matters worse, what I have finished is just horribly disjointed and ewww. I hate it with a passion and cannot figure out anyway to save it from the fiery depths of hell where I think it belongs.

Of course now that I've finished the Twilight series,at least till August, I have hundreds of plots buzzing around in my head.All of them revolving round Jacob and Bella.

Anyway I had to leave Iz by herself this evening and she nearly broke my heart with her whines and yips.Poor puppy. I hope she's okay. I left the light on in the kitchen and my room and left her with food,water and music.She'll only be alone a bit longer then my mother will be home with her.

Augh, more plot bunnies!! It'd be helpful if they actually gave me a whole fic before they began bouncing around my brain.

I hope I didn't miss the shuttle. That would truly suck.I'll find out in 7 more minutes.

PUPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 05:16:46 GMT

So this weekend rocked. Seriously one of the best in recent memory. See I woke up Saturday afternoon (Feb 23rd), after a long morning of shopping for useless junk to find my very hyper mother yelling at me to get up immediately. For like all of six seconds I was pissed that she was interrupting my sleep schedule. Then I noticed the little black ball of fur that was wandering down our hallway. She did it. She actually brought me my puppy! She is so cute!!!!!!! She's a chorkie (a yorkie/chiuahua mix) and we named her Gizmo. Well my mother named her Gizmo Isabella Conchita. I just call her Giz, or Iz. Short and sweet. She is an abosolute babydoll. Really tiny and cute, with these huge black eyes. I love her. I went kinda nuts this weekend and bought her a bed, some new food bowls,toys and clothes. Yep, I did it. I went out and bought clothes for my dog. I know, I know, its crazy to buy clothes for a dog, but she is just so cute and tiny that I couldn't resist. And they look sooooo adorable on her! We plan on going tomorrow to get her groomed and checked out, to make sure she is healthy and happy. Now of course my mother is talking about getting another dog, to keep Iz company. Lol, I would love that. Then we could have two adorable balls of fluff and stuff to dress and play and snuggle with.

The rest of my weekend was spent wth my new puppy. Again BEST FUCKING WEEKEND EVAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gotta love that late winter weather

Fri, 22 Feb 2008 13:48:01 GMT

So we had an ice/snow storm last night and this morning. Awesome. It means I have a valid excuse for taking off tonight;which I did just in case the ice freezes over again tonight. It also means my nother is home all day which could be fun...I think. Depends on if she harrasses me a lot or not.

So I bought the book 'Twilight' on tuesday evening. Didn't start it till yesterday morning. Have finished it already and am desperate for the other books in the series. It was surprisingly good if not a tad bit predictable. Although considering how much I read, I can usually figure out the plot before I'm even a third of the way through the book by now. But still I enjoyed it and I think(think being the operative word) that I will also enjoy the movie. Of course they would have to be true to the book and not try to fudge it up like they've done with other books turned films.

So my biggest loser contest began at work last night. I weigh...well lets just say I weigh more than enough. Like I truly disgust myself with how much I weigh. But anywho the contest began and I even worked out last night! Took me 30 minutes to do 2 miles but I did it. I plan on bringing clothes with me and leaving them so that I can change and work out and not stink. I need to lose at least 15 lbs to win. I want to lose at least 90 by December. That's basically 29 lbs every two months. I can so do that. I have no choice. I need to be at least 125, to be happy with myself.

Ugh, now I'm getting depressed. I'm going to search for a bookstore near me selling the rest of the 'Twilight' books before I get too far gone.

So not feeling this..

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 02:02:11 GMT

Work, that is. I so feel like calling in and saying I'm sick...except I have no occurrences left and can't get written up. So what I'm going to do is go to work today and tomorrow and then schedule off for Friday/Saturday. One of those good days where all I do is sleep.